How to keep going when your confidence shatters

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October 14, 2021

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i'M COURTNEY KIBBY


I was driving down the road jamming out to Kari Jobe after a long and lovely day teaching my sweet third graders. It was my first year teaching, and already I understood why my mom always had the music off in the car … IYKYK…

BUT it was a Friday, and I was excited for the weekend, so I was in my groove — and then lo and behold, at a stoplight, some people in the car next to me had me roll down the window like they needed to ask a question, only to *rudely* laugh at me and make fun of me singing in the car instead of minding their own dang business…

And as I’ve been thinking on this moment in time, it reminded me I STOPPED SINGING IN THE CAR. Honestly, I stopped singing a lot.


Thinking of it honestly sounds silly.

The other day, nearly 10 years later, my husband asked me why I don’t sing like I used to. He’s biased to be sure, but it stopped me in my tracks.

Here’s the thing: I let those people steal my joy. And that’s one thing I never should’ve let them take from me. Not to mention I was worshipping God, so they took the joy I had from singing AND spending time with the Lord.

I mean come ON! FULL STOP — thats how we feel when our confidence has been shattered.

We let it take our joy.

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Don’t let THE ENEMY take your joy.

COURTNEY KIBBY DESIGNS

And well friend, I’m saying NO MORE.

So in this blog I’m sharing how to KEEP GOING when your confidence has been shattered — and why pushing through the blocks and the difficulties helps you get stronger as an artist AND as a person.

Let’s dive in…

PERFECTION DOESN’T EXIST

First off, perfection doesn’t exist. Sometimes we as artists and creatives want so badly for something to be perfect that we wait until it is to start, to open the palette, to do ~the thing~… whatever it is, we wait and wait and wait, until it seems IMPOSSIBLE because it won’t ever be perfect.

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PERFECTION ON EARTH IS A MYTH.

COURTNEY KIBBY DESIGNS

I won’t ever be a Broadway singer — Hamilton and Wicked aren’t calling my name, though that would truly be a dream come true, but here’s the thing about that: IT’S OKAY.

I won’t be a Broadway singer. BUT — I can sing to my kids (that’s one thing I’ve done every night even after the toots in the car), I can sing when I’m cleaning, I can sing when I’m happy or sad or mad — I don’t have to be a Broadway singer to listen to my heart and keep going.

Samesies for ART. Maybe you tried a YouTube video that didn’t quite go as planned. Maybe a painting got ruined and wasn’t salvageable. Whatever it is, remember that it doesn’t have to be perfect because perfection doesn’t exist in this world.

Striving is never the answer — you can want to be great at something without striving for perfection. That only leads to heartache, overwhelm, and burnout.

IT’S FOR THE PROCESS

One of the artists I follow on Instagram says “Do it for the process.” And it has NEVER been more true than when you feel stuck and your confidence has shattered.

Let’s go back to the singing — it’s not about the outcome. I won’t be a Broadway singer. BUT I can learn to sing well — I can still enjoy learning harmonies and singing new songs.

SOMETIMES IT’S NOT ABOUT A PERFECT END RESULT — IT’S ABOUT THE PROCESS OF FINDING YOUR WAY “THERE”.

COURTNEY KIBBY DESIGNS

Art is JUST LIKE THAT. When we do art for the process, not just the outcome, we learn so much about our creativity, our spirit, and what drives us in general. When you keep going, you learn the confidence and courage to keep going (and it doesn’t just happen).

SURRENDER

Give it up — perfection is literally not even close to within reach, and our confidence is going to poop out on us at ✨least✨ every once in a while…

Surrender it.

Give it up — and if you’re interested in trying, pray about it.

Growth happens out of the dark and scary places, the broken places of our story. Out of shattered confidence, comes good work and a keener understanding of our place in this world and the mission you’re on.

So, my friend do not be discouraged. We all go through moments when whether because of our own imposter syndrome, unkind words from others, or a legit moment where shizz hits the fan in our art practice — and such is life.

We live in a broken world, and our confidence will shatter at times. The thing is, is that you *have* to push through and press on because YOUR WORK MATTERS. The art that you do matters. What you create has meaning, intention, and beauty.

You are capable.

Your work means something.

So no matter what that negative inner voice is saying to you…

Keep going, friend. I believe in you!

OR grab your ✨free✨ ULTIMATE GUIDE TO WATERCOLOR SUPPLIES and I’ll hold your hand and help you pick up watercolor.

You’ve got this friend. I’m cheering you on!


Bringing your wedding day to life, thrilling your guests with a show-stopping live wedding painting experience, and creating a timeless keepsake that honors your sacred bond and will warm your heart every time you look at it – it’s what I do best.

Hey, I'm Courtney.

From behind the easel, I serve timeless brides who still embrace the unexpected by creating heirloom painting experiences that are immersive, one-of-a-kind, and thrilling to watch.

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